I job description has come my way that I meet or exceed all of the qualifications for. My experience at Soyokaze (and to a lesser extent Falstaff) has set me up quite well for the ins and outs of testing of test cases and bug reporting and I even have team leadership experience (thanks, Willard!).

There’s only one qualification I lack. The first one:

  • Passion for video games and gaming

I don’t own a Wii. Or an XBox 360. Or a Gamecube or old school XBox. Or an N64. I do have a Playstation 2 with four games on it. One was given to me by a former landlord because it was left behind by a former tenant. Two are different releases of the same EA Sports NCAA Football game and the last is EA Sports NCAA Basketball. When I play those games I literally set everything up, create teams, draft players, and then… let it simulate against itself and watch. I bought the Playstation 2 because I needed a DVD player and wanted to play Bushido Blade II, the only non-Nintendo game I’ve ever loved. Never got around to buying the actual game, though. When I thought that the Playstation was lost in a move, I couldn’t for the life of me justify buying a new one… even used.

Sometimes I do play N64, NES, and SNES games on my computer. During the move I was playing the Zelda game for the SNES, which I’ve conquered four times with the help of of Save State, the ability to freeze a game at any moment so that if I get killed I can go back to that point instead of the beginning of the level. I also use walkthrough guides and cheats. Recently I managed to win the second round of N64 game F-Zero… but my reward was that the game started locking up. Periodically I play Quake II… but always in God mode as it’s mostly an outlet for my male aggressive tendencies. That’s the exception. Mostly I just play these games as a means of relaxation, which means play easier games and cheat, cheat, cheat rather than deal with the stress of losing.

When I was a kid I used to play Tecmo Super Bowl for the NES, one of the best games ever made. The problem is that I couldn’t cheat and that darn game could and did. There was one point where it had decided that I needed to lose so eight of my QB’s nine passes were intercepted and most of those went directly into the other teams’ arms rather than my downfield receiver. I would yell and scream at that game until Dad would come in and threaten to take the game system away from me unless I calmed down. I was sixteen at the time. Ever since then it’s been cheat, cheat, cheat. And for the most part stop playing video games.

I don’t have anything against them in theory. I just (a) stink at them, (b) get frustrated at them and (c) see them as one of the few instruments of timesuck that I can actually avoid.

But… you know… if I was getting paid for it, that might change things. I may stink, but I could be representative of the Novice User! Winning them wouldn’t be a big deal because that wouldn’t be the point. Timesuck isn’t so bad when you’re getting paid for it. Surely I can fake liking these irritating, impossible timesucking devices, can’t I? It’s not like when I was up for a job testing software for a casino where I had moral reservations. I might feel bad about taking the job (if I were to get it) from someone that actually likes games, but then again there is no surer way to stop liking something than to have to actually work with it. So I’d be doing them a favor!

So… uhhh… game on?

Category: Elsewhere

About the Author

Will Truman (trumwill) is a southern transplant in the mountain east with an IT background who bides his time taking care of their daughter while his wife brings home the bacon. You will probably be relieved to know that he does not generally refer to himself in the third-person except when he's writing short bios on his web page.

5 Responses to Trumwill, Counterfeit Gamer

  1. Linus says:

    I like it. You can position yourself as someone who loves burning time with games but readily admits to cheating and frankly doesn’t want or need incredibly complex gameplay or backstory. Given that you wouldn’t be a designer or programmer anyway, they might appreciate someone with that viewpoint.

  2. Willard Lake says:

    If, you know, you wanted to move back to Zarahemla… or even somewhere closer to Falstaff, I could probably axe one of the four people left and bring you in… then bail to become a day trader, leaving you to take the Director spot. These reports don’t write themselves, you know. That’s all I’m saying.

    Good luck on landing that job, or, you know, whatever other job of which you may be thinking.

    You know.

  3. Webmaster says:

    Oddly enough, most videogame reviews are completed with the help of (a) cheat codes and (b) guides direct from the makers.

    If you’re on a deadline to do reviews, timesuck isn’t something you can deal with. That’s one factor in why the “big media” reviews can’t be trusted (the other being the fact that marketing/ad sales is too close to the reviewers and “urges” them to rate up the publishers that spend lots of ad dollars).

  4. Beth says:

    The one good thing I can say about video games as a whole is that they build eye-hand coordination.

  5. trumwill says:

    Linus, I was kind of thinking along those lines, but apparently they disagreed because they never called me back.

    Willard, is this really the time to become a day trader? That’s only one step safer than working in the mortgage industry :).

    Web, I was actually thinking about that as I was pondering what it would be like to be a game tester dude. You’d pretty much have to have cheats. I can see the same being true for reviews.

    Beth, I think that video games offer more than that. At least they do these days. They can be incredibly complex and challenge the mind as well as the fingers. I should write a post on this at some point.

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