Yesterday before work, a coworker scared the crap out of me. He said that almost all of the counties Cascadia have gone to mail-in voting only. That explained something I’d always been curious about (but never so curious as to get off my posterior and follow up). Without my asking for one, I had received a mail-in ballot. I ignored it because I was going to show up to the polling place. Then when my wife did not receive one, I forgot all about it. So I tried to load up the Seagull County voting registration page to find out for sure. You might be shocked to discover that the polling page is overloaded the day before election day. On one hand, it’s hardly shocking. On the other hand, that’s when a polling location page is useful!

After much difficulty, I was delighted to discover that Seagull County is the only hold-out with the old fashioned polling locations. Zaulem County has apparently gone mail-in only this election (or so the website says) and every county except those two had already gone mail-in. So I breathed a sigh of relief until I actually looked at the polling locations page and discovered that Seagull County has polling on a precinct-by-precinct basis. I didn’t even know what precinct I was in. And I didn’t know if I’d be able to find the mail-in ballot I’d tossed aside. And if we were mail-in only, where the heck is Clancy’s ballot?!

After getting home I looked at our voter registration cards. Hers included a polling address, so we were set. Right? Right?! Well, maybe not. My card didn’t give a polling location, instead saying that a mail-in ballot had been sent to me at my request. My request? I had requested no such thing! I would have remembered such a request and having no memory of the request no request was made. Of that I was sure. Didn’t matter, though, because the possibility struck me that maybe they wouldn’t let me vote in person if they sent out a mail-in ballot. Cascadia’s election page didn’t tell me and Seagull County’s wasn’t loading at all.

So I scrambled until I found the mail-in ballot in my car. My car?! There was no way that I would put it in my car! I would have remembered such a placement and having no… oh, screw it, I must have put the darn thing in my car. So I managed to unpack the ballot and fill it out. All was right with the world, except for one little thing. I don’t want to mail my ballot in. Going to the polling location is ceremonial for me. Seeing as how my actual vote is exceptionally unlikely to turn the presidential race (since I’m only a temporary resident, it doesn’t feel right to vote in local races, except the gubernatorial one because I’m inconsistent that way), the ceremony of performing my civic duty is about all I’ve got. Sending in a darn envelope lacks flare.

So I did some more scooting around on the voting web page and discovered that I can hand-deliver the ballot to the Auditor if I so choose. So that’s my new plan.

Clancy, meanwhile, was on call last night. She’s likely to be a zombie when she gets back, but she told me to make sure to remind her to vote (so that she can maintain female-dogging rights). So I left her a note on the door, on her chair, and on the bed. I also left her a GoogleMap to the polling location, her voter registration card, and a utility bill in case she needs it (she still has an Estacado driver’s license). I am the king of overkill, I guess.

Either way this goes, history is in the making. I fully expect Chariots of Fire to be blaring in the background as I deliver my sealed ballot to the appropriate county official.